Wisdom From Kammbia 3.5: Thoughts On Marriage After 5 Years

by | Oct 7, 2012 | Wisdom From Kammbia Column | 1 comment

My wife and I celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary this weekend. Wow, five years of marriage have gone by quickly. Time flies and definitely waits for no one.  Here’s a few things I’ve learned about marriage so far:

1) Men Chase, Women Choose: In courting (going old school here), a man chased the woman he wanted but it’s the woman whom decided if she’s going to marry him. Well, that doesn’t change when you are married. Men can lead or chase in some marital decisions, but it’s still the woman whom chooses if its going to happen or not.

2) A Husband and Wife Must Be Friends: It’s funny while dating no guy ever wanted to be in the “friend zone” because he knew that would be the “kiss of death” for that potential relationship. Well, it’s different in marriage. Friendship is extremely important and much-needed because a husband and wife must like each other as well love each other.

3) Men and Women Communicate Differently: Duh….I know this one is obvious. However, when you are living with another person everyday it’s amazing how you can still miscommunicate with each other. Even though, you may think you are in tuned with your spouse. Listening, Repeating, Listening is now a constant in my head. LOL!!

4) Forgiveness: Oh boy! This word is really popular at church and those self-help/make-me-feel better and enhance my self-esteem books. However, the rubber hits the road with this concept in a marriage. Because you will hurt each other expectedly and unexpectedly at times. Forgiveness must be applied consistently for any marriage to thrive. And both of you at times will have to fall on that sword of forgiveness even if you feel you didn’t do anything wrong to your spouse.

5) Husband And Wife Must Make Time For Each Other As A Couple: With busy careers, raising children, spiritual life, socializing with friends and family members, the modern life is hectic and fast-paced. Couples need to find a way to spend time together alone and enjoy each other’s company. Whether it’s once a month or a week or every other week find time to do it. It is so beneficial to that marriage.

Those are things I’ve learned so far. I know there are numerous other things I could have listed. 🙂

1 Comment

  1. Marge Martin

    My thoughts on marriage:



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